From Sarah: I love Christmas. Or Rather I love Advent and all the excitement it brings.
The days leading up to Christmas are easier for me than the actual day(s). Christmas Eve night is when we (my family and I have always celebrated ). My memories of the years before Bobby died and my moving to Florida were the best. Always.
I still call my dad in Arizona (missing my mom), family in Colorado, And the rest of my family in Illinois. Danny always works that day but makes sure he gets off ASAP Christmas Eve Day. No Late Field. No calls to cover for someone. We will do emergencies…..that is a given.
He always works Christmas Day and the days to follow. Always.
Danny and I have a simple night. We sit by the Christmas Tree and watch the lights.
I fix a special evening’s worth of favorite foods. (This year we are a mite skimpy on what I have to fix).
We open or RATHER he opens what few gifts I have saved up to buy him. This year I am thankful I bought a few things earlier in the year since I wasn’t really able to save much this year. (Christmas morning or whenever that day we do stocking gifts (I have also bought those).
Until last year, I (we) had gifts that my mom would make and send. Plus I always got a few things she knew I loved. Real Peppermint candy. Plus candy canes. She always sent a box of those with my birthday card.
Last year We got a couple of gifts from the park. I am always included in them. Yet, they are Danny’s.
I didn’t have anything to open last year.
My Christmas gift last year was my trip home in November for Mom’s Memorial Service. That was an awesome gift since we certainly didn’t have the money for me to go home.
I did get money from Dad. It will be used to pay a few bills or to buy groceries. I am thankful for that.
I know it is not about the gifts but I hate it when the last few years, I get asked what Danny got me and I have to say I got a card. Don’t get me wrong, that Christmas Card is Precious to me. The I love You, Sarah….Love Danny is about the only time I get to see those words any more.
Danny doesn’t get into the religious part of Christmas like I do either. He believes but doesn’t go to church.
I come through the holidays feeling LOST and LONELY. Wondering where they went.
This year has been easier because of the Advents Series I have done. I am filled with the SPIRIT. Easier because of YOU ALL.
The Little Girl inside me still wants the magic. The JOY. I am missing HOPE as well this year.
There are people who don’t look forward to this time of year – perhaps you’re one of them. The reasons for this are as varied as