Making My Home A Haven is important to me. Sharing homemaking skills. Recipes and food. Bible Studies. This is a treasure chest of goodies. So take a seat. Have a glass of tea and enjoy. You will learn all about who I am.
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From Sarah :
Across from the entrance to Lake Kissimmee State Park is Camp Mack Resort and Liar’s Lair Saloon. Actually, the name has changed to Gator SOMETHING. (Gator Mack’s ?)…..But the locals still call it Liar’s Lair Saloon.
This painting was done by a local. I wish it was still there.
The “New ” Look. Now it just looks like any old Florida Bar.
Gator Mack’s. (How Catchy is that? )
Danny and I use to go there to celebrate our birthdays. and Bobby’s birthday and his angel day. We play the jukebox and DANCE. Usually during the afternoon when no one was there.
Those were GREAT TIMES. I miss them.
“Night’s In White Satin” Is Our Favorite Song to Dance to.
I try and live by those words as best as I can.
I don’t know how many times I have been asked “Why I thought Bobby was taken so early” .
There is STILL no answer to that question. None that I would ever accept. So I don’t question it.
I just accept that we don’t know why certain people die before their time or what WE consider to be their time.
It WAS their time to go.
I was also asked right after he died if I was still going to move to Florida.
I never understood (at the time) what my moving to Florida had to do with Bobby’s death.
I made the choice BEFORE Bobby died.
Later on though,
I realized that it really was a great question.I didn’t know back then, all I was giving up. I gave up EVERYTHING for love. For Danny.
Was it enough? For years it was.
Why should I have changed my mind?
I knew leaving Colorado would be hard. I honestly had NO IDEA how HARD it would be.
Not at first. Not in those first 5 years. Danny and I were making a new life for ourselves.
I loved park life back then. The long crazy hours working with Danny. Or by myself, just waiting for Danny to get off. I craved the busyness back then. I needed it.
Danny and I did everything together.
Then we moved into The Cracker House after years of working together on it. We moved out of the RV that was OUR first home.
I tried to volunteer as I had always done. It’s hard to explain how difficult our manager all of a sudden made it.
So I started volunteering less. Then Less.
Danny and I weren’t working together.
We got sidetracked alone the way.
Actually, if I am being totally honest….he drifted.
I also had no idea how much I would miss Colorado.
It IS as much a part of me as is my birth state, Illinois is.
The mountains call me every day. 24/7. 365 days a year.
I knew the heat and humidity would be hard. I really never realized how hard it would be as the years changed and I grew older.
I hate it here.
The question I heard most was:
How can you have fun without your son being here?
I didn’t die that day, although many times it felt as if I did. Still does.
Even during Hell Week (The week right after Bobby died when Danny and my family were there) as I call it. remember having moments that were awesome and wonderful.
Sure, it was a nightmare. I couldn’t close my eyes because all I saw was Bobby’s lying dead on the floor.
I remember everything about that moment. That day when I walked into his apartment.
I remember the smell.
I remember hearing on his stereo.
“Sweet Home Alabama ”
To this day, Hearing that song makes me GAG If I am home by myself or hear it on the radio.
I live in the SOUTH.
We have Events at the park. At every event : If there is Music and Dancing THAT SONG will be played.
It happened the first event we had at the park.
Danny and I were dancing with so many others when IT came on.
I must have made a loud noise someone asked if I was OK.
Danny held onto me and whispered in my ear,
“Sarah, We can get through this. Hang on and Dance with me. I will hold you. No one will ever know.”
Somehow we made it all the way through the song.
(Danny seems to forgotten what THAT song still does to me. )
We’ve made it all the way through IT every time since then.
I choice to face IT rather than ruin it for everyone else.
I got sidetracked:
I had some good times that week. Hell week.
Danny was there almost right away. Donna, my sister flew out right away.
Mom and dad drove straight through.
My aunt and uncle lived in Colorado.
My best friend’s daughter was there.
They were all staying at the house I raised Bobby at.
We spent one afternoon going through scrapbooks and photo albums. We all told stories about Bobby and His Cousins.
We laughed and CRIED and laughed and CRIED.
Danny held me that whole week. He sang to me.
We took long walks.
What I am getting at is:
Yes, His death was, and always will be, the worse thing that can happen to me.
After everyone went home, I could have wallowed in my grief.
I did for a week. I gave myself that much time.
Then I went about LIVING.
I had a wedding to cancel and reschedule.
I had to get the house ready for it’s NEW OWNER’S
and I had to clean out Bobby’s Apartment.
Danny was there for the worse of it.
I had 2 close down 2 places instead of one.
I never ever thought about changing my plans. More than anything, I want to marry Danny.
Yes, I could have used some more time to go through things.
But then no Mom should ever have to do what I was doing,
What thousands and thousands of moms and dads have had to do before me.
YOU JUST GET IT DONE.
Life is meant to be lived.
I had years to live back then.
I wanted to make the most of them.
For the most part, I have done just that.
“As much as we love to write, it’s important to take breaks — to live your life and have new experiences, and to reflect and recharge so you can come back to your desk, ready t0hit the keyboard again. Not writing allows you to gain the distance from your words, and thus perspective, which are both needed when it’s time to edit.
Being active every day makes it easier to hear that inner voice.
— Haruki Murakami, What I Talk About When I Talk About Running
Write every day, but don’t put your life on hold . . .
What do you do when you’re not writing? How do you reset and return to this dashboard, refreshed? What do you need in your day-to-day life to maintain balance: Running? Yoga? Gardening? Painting? Cooking?
Today, publish your post in any form you wish, as long as you focus on one or all of these questions.”
I changed the title a bit.
I also just posted this before I was even close to being ready.
How Do I Recharge My Batteries
(Not Just For Writing )
I need a breath of fresh air and isn’t this post about taking a breather. Refreshing ourselves. Recharging our bodies?
I take deep Breaths all Day long.
Breathing in and out.
When I am stuck inside like I have been for so many months I often go and take a cold /cool shower to refresh me. I get hot easily. Sweaty.
This wakes me up and restores me.
When I can’t get outside I walk around the house.
I do little things that need to be done.
I put the dishes up.
I cook to relieve any tension I may have.
I read a book. A real book. Not off the computer.
I turn some music on.
Turn Your Radio
Turn Your Radio On
I seldom turn my radio on anymore. I like choosing what I listen to.
I have playlists on Youtube and elsewhere.
I Listen to music.
I watch old movies.
But when I am feeling good and it is cool outside :
I OPEN EVERY WINDOW IN THE HOUSE
I GO FOR LONG WALKS
I GO TO BOBBY’S COVE
I TAKE A LONG DRIVE HERE ON ROLLING MEADOWS RANCH
To the Right Is Bobby’s Cove although you get to it going leff.
Left takes you all over Rolling Meadows Ranch
Left will also take you all the way to Allen David Broussard Catfish Creek Preserve State Park and Fire Tower Road Outside Haines City. (It is a beautiful drive passing the old sod fields and Catfish Creek- thru marshes and places with funny sounding names – up and down sandy HILLS .
Left takes you to the old bridge that you don’t dare drive over now.
Left takes you to the old shop and old barn. And oh so many other places.
I GO HIKING AT THE PARK
I DANCE IN THE RAIN
Have you recharged your batteries so you can write?